Tag: HOPE

How to stand firm in the face of adversity

Hi lovelies,

Happy new month! Can’t believe we’re half way through the year, and into the summer months, already. I hope you are all keeping well, and that life is treating you kindly.

In today’s blogpost I wanted to write a piece of encouragement for anyone who may be faced with adversities.

With every new day, comes new possibilities, strengths and thoughts. While other days, also bring the least expected obstacles and challenges. The nature, significance and extent of these obstacles and challenges vary from person to person, however, the importance of standing firm in the face of these adversities, remains the great equaliser.

It’s now been two long years since the panoramic halted all of our lives, and although we somehow learnt to just ride the endless waves of uncertainty – it is important to consciously learn to stand firm when adversities strike, rather than allow the waves to drown us out.

Based on my own experience, one can learn to stand firm by;

  1. Shifting your mindset
  2. Establishing a strong support system, and,
  3. Consciously reflecting and redirecting

1. Shifting your mindset

It’s true what they say, your perception directly impacts your reality. Quite simply put, we see the world, not as it is, but as we are!

If you don’t like something in your life, change it! And I know that can be easier said than done, but with the right focus and dedication, you can make your dreams and desires a reality.

“The problems you face are not STOP signs, they are guidelines.”

Your life is controlled by what you focus on, so focus on the good.

2. Establishing a strong support system

Having a strong support system is pertinent during trying times. Ensure that your immediate circle of family and friends are a reliable and strong source of support to you, and focus on creating boundaries and/or mending those that aren’t.

I once read a quote that said: “Whatever you are going through in life, both positive and negative, takes a village – because you are not meant to go through it alone”.

Healthy and strong support systems are sources of wisdom & guidance, strength & hope, and, understanding & compassion.

Does your current circle of friends and family currently reflect the above characteristics?

3. Consciously reflecting and redirecting

“Without reflection, we go blindly on our way creating more unintended consequences…”

Margaret J. Wheatley

I am a strong believer in all things reflection in both personal and professional life. It is, and has proven to be the key to success, and personal development in my life.

This is at large due to the fact that reflection allows me to pay particular attention to past actions and thoughts, with emphasis on identifying future learning and growth opportunities in my life.

Through reflection, you have the ability to take stock of how you’re living your life and redirect it’s course, where necessary, in advance to unexpected trials and tribulations.

By engaging in ongoing self reflection, you will soon develop a strong sense of resilience and self awareness, which in turn will help you stand firm when faced, with lives endless adversities.

By following the above steps, you will soon learn to view adversities as stepping stones to greatness, rather than stumbling blocks.

Love, Nyasha x

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Lessons I learnt in 2021

Hi lovelies,

Happy New Month! I guess it’s far too late for me to wish you all a Happy New Year, seeing as we’re now well into the month of February. However, I hope 2022 has been good to each of you thus far, and I wish you all nothing but happiness, success and good health throughout the year.

I know it’s been quite a while since I’ve posted anything on here, but today I wanted to share some of the life lessons I learnt over the last year. 2021 was a whirlwind of a year for me. It was filled with so many highs and just as many lows. It was definitely a year that pushed me out of my comfort zones, changed my mindset, and also caused me to consider the fact that not everything is always as it seems.

When I look back on the previous year, here are 3 major life lessons that I learnt.

1. Trust your gut

I’m sure we’ve all heard the old saying “trust your gut”. It refers to listening to your intuition. By doing so, this enables us to avoid unhealthy situations and relationships.

Over the last year, I was lucky enough to work overseas – and as wonderful as the opportunity was – in one way or another, it continously reminded me of the importance of staying true to oneself.

More often than not, I was forced to refocus on my gut feelings, and although this would sometimes feel similar to physical feelings associated with anxiety, in due time I would always feel a sense of safety, peace and even happiness, once I had followed my gut.

“Sometimes we create our own heartbreaks through ignoring our intuition”

2. Do not overly depend on any one person

Now before I delve into this point, I want to start by saying that I am a firm believer in the proverb that states that ‘no man is an island’, meaning that none of us are truly self sufficient. We desire human connections for comfort and community.

However, that doesn’t mean we should overly depend on any one person, whether that be your partner, best friend, cousin, mother, father and/or sibling.

The reality is, that we came into this world alone, and we’ll leave it alone. So, whilst we continue to rely on community in order to thrive in each of our individual lives, let’s learn to also stand alone. Become comfortable in your own company – there is honestly nothing more empowering than learning to enjoy ones solitude. By doing so you will quickly grow to learn that your happiness, self worth and state of contentment is not determined by others.

“Never search for happiness in others, it will make you feel alone. Search for it within yourself, you will feel happy even when you’re left alone”

3. Admitting you need help is okay

“One of the biggest defects in life is the inability to ask for help”

Everyone of us require help, and support every once in a while – and this is perfectly fine. As mentioned previously, ‘no man is an island’, therefore we cannot and shouldn’t expect ourselves to carry troubles all on our own.

Unfortunately, many of us still struggle to ask for help, even when we desperately need it. As a result we leave ourselves open to feelings of depression which may also result in the deterioration of our careers and relationships. Some of us have the belief that to be considered a ‘strong individual’ you must be able to face all your challenges on your own. However, this is very far from the truth.

By asking for help when we need it, we save ourselves from a lot of unnecessary emotional burden.

Remember, “a problem shared is a problem halved”

In the words of Barack Obama,

“… Don’t be afraid to ask for help when you need it. I do that every day. Asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness, it’s a sign of strength. It shows you have the courage to admit when you don’t know something, and then allows you to learn something new.”

2009

I could continue to list out many other lessons I learnt over the course of 2021, but I thought I would keep this blog short and sweet. I hope that this blog post resonated with at least one of you, and reinforced something that you needed to hear.

With that being said, I hope 2022 is filled with nothing but growth for each every single one of us.

Reflect, refresh and refocus as often, and as much as you need to.

Love, Nyasha x

Count your blessings

Hi lovelies,

Firstly, I just want to say a massive thank you for all the support shown in my previous blogpost – writing has always been one of my favourite pastimes, so I really appreciate every single interaction shown on what I put out there.

In today’s blog post, I wanted to talk a little bit about gratitude and why it’s important to count your blessings.

In life, it is so easy to fall victim to the fallacy of permanence, most of us don’t stop to recognise our good fortune and blessings until they are gone. When asked, I would usually describe myself, as having a glass half full mindset, however quiet recently I noticed that I was slipping into constant and frequent states of ingratitude. In these moments I would moan and grumble about everything and anything under the sun, and because of this, my overall mindset became rather negative. Luckily, I quickly realised this and decided to intentionally focus a little more on the good in my life.

I once read a quote that said;

” A sincere attitude of gratitude is a beatitude for secured altitudes. Appreciate what you have been given and you will be promoted higher.”

Israelmore Ayivor

Having now, readapted my attitude of gratitude, I have come to see a positive change in my life. I am making it more of a habit to express thankfulness and appreciation in all areas, no matter how big or small. This in turn has made me feel so much more satisfied with life, because I am no longer seeking for more. I am consciously making the decision to live in the present moment.

So if you haven’t done so in a while, I would personally encourage you to write down some of the things you’re grateful for. This could include simple things such as, food, clothing, family and friends; or even more elaborate things such as life’s challenges, love, laughter and even heartbreaks.

You will be surprised at how full your heart feels as you come to realize how much you have to be thankful for.

Love, Nyasha x

Lockdown, yet again…

Hi lovelies,

I hope you’re all keeping well, despite some of us being back under lockdown.

Yes, you read that right, lockdown número dos, for the unlucky residents of Kildare, Laois and Offaly.

Regardless of the circumstances, let’s try not to lose hope.

We’ve all been through a lockdown before, and despite how hard it was. We got through it!

So in everything that we do, and as we go about our day to day business, let’s continue to support one another through this strange season.

It’s important we don’t lose hope of a better tomorrow, because of the current circumstances we may face. In times like this, I think it’s important to tell ourselves, to …

“Stop being afraid of what can go wrong and start being positive about what can go right”

In due time things will get better, but till then let’s all continue to make a conscious effort to do our part to minimize the risk.

Love, Nyasha x

How to minimise the stress you’re feeling concerning Covid-19

Hi lovelies,

I hope you and your loved ones are all keeping well during these unprecedented times, and doing your part to minimise the spread of coronavirus by wearing your masks, washing your hands and avoiding overly crowded areas.

Today I wanted to share a few tips on how to minimise the stress you may be feeling regarding Covid-19, and the mere thought of a second wave.

The times we are currently living in, have proven to be extremely overwhelming to each and everyone of us – not only as individuals but also as a society. It’s very important that we continue to look after our health, both physically and mentally. Here is a few ways to do so;

1. Limit your consumption of news – especially if it’s not from a credible source

I’m sure I’m not the only one, whose overall news consumption skyrocketed at the start of the pandemic. We were all craving to stay informed in order to control all the uncertainy. However, like most of you, I quickly learnt that this obsession led to fatigue and/or anxiety.

Whether we are progressing or regressing, I think it’s important for us to come to terms with how much news is too much for our mental health. It’s important that we stay informed, but it’s equally important that we learn to accept what is beyond our control. We need to remain focused on the factors that we can control.

2. Do your part

Although the pandemic has restricted the extent to which we live our lives, we all still have a part to play in order to overcome the Covid-19 pandemic.

By making a conscious effort to follow the regulations and guidelines advised, we can all continue to take better care of ourselves both physically and mentally whilst still enjoying the things we love.

3. Do not depend on your own understanding

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding”

Proverbs 3:5

During these unprecedented times, its so easy for our minds to run wild and imagine all the worst case scenarios.

One thing that significantly helped me and continues to help me during this season, is remembering that God is in control.

I know some of you reading this may not be believers, but my encouragement for each of us is taken from a quote that says,

“There is HOPE, even when your brain tells you there isn’t”

John Green

Have faith that things will work out.

Love, Nyasha x

Dear Class of 2020

Hey lovelies,

I know it’s been some time since I’ve written a blog, but now that I am finally done my degree, I hope to be posting much more content.

Today’s blogpost goes out to the Class of 2020 – the final year college students and those in their 6th year of secondary school.

This one is for us.

Who would have known, that we would be finishing our final months of education in the midst of a pandemic. COVID-19, has stripped us of one of the most cherished moments of our youth. We were supposed to have finished the final few months of eduction, alongside our peers, but instead this journey ended over emails, zoom calls and online classes.

It was not supposed to be this way.

If you’re anything like me, you have experienced a whirlwind of emotions, in the last few weeks. The virus forced us to quickly adapt to the new normal, and accept changes that have taken away from our educational experience. This adaption has created feelings of uncertainty concerning our futures and has brought about increased levels of anxiety and stress.

However, I would like to encourage each of us with the following words.

I know times are unprecedented, but do not lose hope. We may not know what lies ahead of us but let’s endeavour to persevere. The world is still our oyster and what’s meant for us, won’t pass us by.

Despite the circumstance, you still have so much potential and a purpose to fulfil. Times are tough right now, but don’t let the dark clouds erase your hopes and visions.

“Remember, this too shall pass.”

Love, Nyasha x

Why prioritizing yourself, is the best decision you’ll ever make

Hi lovelies,

How are you all keeping?

Before I dive into today’s blog post, I just want to apologize for the lack of content on this blog lately. The reality is that, college has finally decided to take its preeminence in my life again. Deadlines are beginning to pile up on me, and as a result, for the time being, I have no other choice but to prioritize my education, meaning content on the blog will now be limited to when I can, instead of on a weekly basis.

I am not saying goodbye, but I am just giving each of you a heads up, not to be expecting a weekly blog post as I was previously accustomed to. Instead I will try pop on as often as I can, with as much advice, updates and positive energy, as possible!

For the time being, I just want to say thank you for the continuous support that each of you have given me since starting – I honestly feel like I can never say it enough.

For all the shares, comments, words of encouragement and for simply taking the time to read what I put out. Thank you!

Anyways… enough of the soppy stuff. Let’s get into the topic, of today’s blog post;

Why prioritizing yourself, is the best decision you’ll ever make.

Growing up, I was always that child who would drop everything and anything to be there for the people around me.

I have a very giving personality and I never really knew my limit. I would bend backwards for people who would rarely do the same for me.

As I went through my teenage years, I quickly identified this trait and how detrimental it was becoming for me. I was beginning to feel exhausted, frustrated and even angry when I would not receive the same energy I would consistently give out.

I would question my self worth, identity, friendships and life itself. All because I had convinced myself that I loved being a giver. That I am someone everyone should be able to count on, when they are in need.

From a young age we are all taught that giving is the best way to show kindness.

We are all guilty at chorusing the idea that ‘sharing is caring’ – but never explaining to what extent. No wonder why it becomes so easy for some of us to get caught up in unhealthy cycles that may begin to take a toil on our health.

When your constantly the one who gives and gives, you risk burning yourself out. Your well, begins to run dry, and as a result you begin to form resentful feelings.

If you relate to ever feeling any of the above emotions because of your tendency to give a little more than is necessary, I want to encourage you to find a balance.

Begin to identify when your giving out of love or when you’re giving out of guilt and negativity.

Unfortunately I can’t tell you exactly how to find this balance for yourself, but what I can share, is how doing so, for myself, has benefited me.

1. I began to value myself

As I mentioned above, over giving caused me to develop negative emotions. It took a significant toil on my self-esteem and made me question my self worth and value. I almost began to feel like it was normal for people to walk all over me. However, once I identified the negative emotions, that stemmed from giving too much. I quickly began to put value on myself.

Now I have learnt to quickly take two steps back, when I feel under appreciated or taken for granted.

I’m not saying that I expect to be thanked or praised when I go out of my way for someone, but if I’m constantly questioning the other individuals intentions, my time will quickly become limited.

2. My giving became much more genuine

If you were to ask me what my favorite characteristic, that I possess is, I would undoubtedly say that it is my giving spirit.

However at one point in time, I found myself giving for all the wrong reasons. I remember feeling guilty and under pressure, to do it all! To give, because it made me look good, or because I felt morally obliged to.

To overcome this, I had to learn to prioritize my own needs, and as a result, I started giving from a cheerful place, once again!

I took care of my own needs, which in turn gave me the energy necessary, to take care of, and put energy that was light, joyful and void of pressure, into others.

3. I began to focus on my own goals

When your a naturally giving person, it is very easy to focus entirely on other individuals, besides yourself.

You begin to focus all your time and energy into them, leaving little to no time for you. You slowly become sidetracked by their life, and slowly begin to divert all attention, away from your own ambitions and plans.

By balancing how much of me, I was giving to people, I began to regain my own zeal for life. I no longer craved that thrill, I got from helping people. I stopped allowing, giving to be the only drive I had in life. I realized I had more to offer!

Prioritizing myself, was and is one of the best decisions I have ever made, because it caused me to develop as an individual. I became an even happier person, because I grew to be content in myself, as opposed to being content in the way others saw me. I started to become (well at least tried…), as invested in myself as I was in others.

To whoever this has resonated with – I beg you to find your balance. Stop feeling guilty. Let go of the pressures of society.

Protect your energy, by prioritizing yourself.

Yes it’s all well and good, to be there for everyone and anyone, but if you can’t even be there for yourself, what good are you?

Reminder; You are allowed to help yourself before you help others.

Love, Nyasha x

The Pressure of Young Success

Hi lovelies,

It’s been less than a week, but it honestly feels like forever since I sat down at my laptop with the intent to blog. I actually miss having all the time in the world for blogging – but now I’m back to routines, time tables and managing college assignments, what a dream!

Whilst getting ready for work, last Sunday I decided to incorporate something new into my morning routine; listening to a podcast! Considering I had a lot of catching up to do, I decided to tune into ‘Stallion’ a podcast hosted by Agnes – Clara Dikoum (available across multiple platforms).

While scrolling through her podcasts, a particular one titled “Pressure of Young Success”, caught my attention. With college back in the works, and graduation 2020 on my mind, the thoughts of success and what to do next, are constantly lingering in my head.

It’s crazy, isn’t it. We go from being children who couldn’t care less about what’s to come, to young people, who desire control in every phase of our lives. If you are anything like me, your mind begins to time travel – and ever so vividly, at that. You begin to imagine yourself 5 years older, financially stable, with a house, car, husband, and a secure job you love. All of which don’t occur overnight but somehow you begin to desire, that this could be your reality.

In May 2018, a survey undertaken by the Mental Health Foundation, found that six out of ten young people, between the ages of 18-24, have felt so stressed by the pressures to succeed, that they began struggling to cope with life’s demands.

Although alarming, these figures don’t even surprise me in the slightest.

In a world that is populated with pressure, not only from your family and friends, but also celebrities, influencers, ‘instagram goals’ and much, much more – it is so hard, not to get sunk into the idea that success occurs over night.

On a daily basis, we are fed unrealistic expectations of what life should consist of, how we should be living, or what stage of life we should be at.

For some of us, our goals are set to be completed by the age of 25 and for others it could be 30.

This mindset however, can be so unrealistic and detrimental for our futures.

I’m not saying you can’t be successful by the age of 30 – Forbes 30 under 30, already argues otherwise. However, it is important to remember that success is not always measured by power, status, fame and/or money.

The word success is described in the Cambridge Dictionary as “the [achievemnet] of … results wanted or hoped for”. These results are not limited to time and can be achieved on the straight or narrow path, depending on the individual and their resources. By staying determined and consistent, and by accepting failures, set backs and obstacles, we each have the ability to come out on top.

Don’t let other people’s definitions of success define you.

“Love the life you have, while you create the life of your dreams”

Love, Nyasha x

Stop underestimating yourself

Hi lovelies,

Before I get into this weeks blogpost, I just want to say my sincere apologies for not posting one last week. I was honestly so exhausted by the time it got to the weekend, and just kept experiencing writing blocks whenever I sat down to write. Thankfully I’m well rested now, the sun is shining and I am feeling super motivated to conquer the week!

Yesterday as I was scrolling through Instagram, I came across a quote that read “Stop underestimating yourself”.

Tomorrow, I start my final year in college – and I’d be lying to you, if I was to say that, I wasn’t feeling worried and overwhelmed. Quite simply, the thoughts of ‘THE THESIS’ scare me! When I think about gathering all the research involved in it, I start to undermine not only my abilities but also myself.

For some reason, in my head I have managed to construct the belief that I am going to walk into my Research Project module and be flung into the deep end with 0 assistance. However, in reality, I know this won’t be the case. I can be rest assured that my lecturers, friends and family will be there every step of the way – to offer guidance, support and encouragement when in need.

This year surely wont be the easiest but I will definitely pull through it.

“Sometimes when you are the closest to your breakthrough the pressure is the greatest. You have come too far to give up now!” – Joyce Meyer

Whether you are starting college, going into your final year, or embarking on a new life venture, do not underestimate yourself.

Believe in your abilities.

Each of us was born with the potential to do great things – but those great things can only come to flourish when we believe.

“You must expect great things of yourself, before you can do them”

Love, Nyasha x

My Midnight Lament

Hi lovelies,

As mentioned from the very creation of this blog – Nyasha’s Nook, is a space, I created to offer seclusion and security to those in need, including myself. In today’s blog post I wanted to take a more serious approach, which I hope will not only provide healing to me, but also to those around me who have been affected or who are in similar situations.

Without delving into the whole story, during the week, a situation arose, that caused me to utter the words – ‘I wish I was never abused’.

Later, as I was reflecting on those 5 small yet mighty words, I began to realize the effect everything was still having on my life, to this very day.

For many years I was aware, yet doubted the fact that I was ever a victim of such. However over the last year, I have come to realize that I was maltreated. I was taken advantage of, whether knowingly or unknowingly by certain individuals.

Without getting into the nitty gritty of it all, I still always question what my life would have been like, if I had never experienced the things I did. Would I have been more ambitious? Would I trust more? Would I have a higher self esteem? The queries only go on and on…

Despite the fact that the reality of it all, is horrific. I choose to not let it define me. I choose to let go of the hurt, bitterness and pain associated with the sheer thoughts of the experiences. I am deciding not to allow it to affect my life negatively any longer.

Yes, there will be days that it will be a lot harder to pick myself up from the bitterness, but I will at least make the effort to stand up tall, and to encourage those behind me.

The sad reality, is that, each of us has been abused in one way or another, whether sexually, physically, mentally, verbally, emotionally, financially and/or spiritually. These forms of abuse can occur, for both short and long periods of time, and their effects may vary from one individual to the next.

If you are reading this and you are/have been a victim of abuse, these affirmations are for you;

I am loved.

I am appreciated.

I am valued.

I will prosper.

I have a purpose.

I will succeed.

I will be patient with myself as I heal.

“Your past is just a story. And once you realize this it has no power over you” ~ Chuck Palahniuk

Love, Nyasha x