Tag: success

How to stand firm in the face of adversity

Hi lovelies,

Happy new month! Can’t believe we’re half way through the year, and into the summer months, already. I hope you are all keeping well, and that life is treating you kindly.

In today’s blogpost I wanted to write a piece of encouragement for anyone who may be faced with adversities.

With every new day, comes new possibilities, strengths and thoughts. While other days, also bring the least expected obstacles and challenges. The nature, significance and extent of these obstacles and challenges vary from person to person, however, the importance of standing firm in the face of these adversities, remains the great equaliser.

It’s now been two long years since the panoramic halted all of our lives, and although we somehow learnt to just ride the endless waves of uncertainty – it is important to consciously learn to stand firm when adversities strike, rather than allow the waves to drown us out.

Based on my own experience, one can learn to stand firm by;

  1. Shifting your mindset
  2. Establishing a strong support system, and,
  3. Consciously reflecting and redirecting

1. Shifting your mindset

It’s true what they say, your perception directly impacts your reality. Quite simply put, we see the world, not as it is, but as we are!

If you don’t like something in your life, change it! And I know that can be easier said than done, but with the right focus and dedication, you can make your dreams and desires a reality.

“The problems you face are not STOP signs, they are guidelines.”

Your life is controlled by what you focus on, so focus on the good.

2. Establishing a strong support system

Having a strong support system is pertinent during trying times. Ensure that your immediate circle of family and friends are a reliable and strong source of support to you, and focus on creating boundaries and/or mending those that aren’t.

I once read a quote that said: “Whatever you are going through in life, both positive and negative, takes a village – because you are not meant to go through it alone”.

Healthy and strong support systems are sources of wisdom & guidance, strength & hope, and, understanding & compassion.

Does your current circle of friends and family currently reflect the above characteristics?

3. Consciously reflecting and redirecting

“Without reflection, we go blindly on our way creating more unintended consequences…”

Margaret J. Wheatley

I am a strong believer in all things reflection in both personal and professional life. It is, and has proven to be the key to success, and personal development in my life.

This is at large due to the fact that reflection allows me to pay particular attention to past actions and thoughts, with emphasis on identifying future learning and growth opportunities in my life.

Through reflection, you have the ability to take stock of how you’re living your life and redirect it’s course, where necessary, in advance to unexpected trials and tribulations.

By engaging in ongoing self reflection, you will soon develop a strong sense of resilience and self awareness, which in turn will help you stand firm when faced, with lives endless adversities.

By following the above steps, you will soon learn to view adversities as stepping stones to greatness, rather than stumbling blocks.

Love, Nyasha x

Advertisement

Lessons I learnt in 2021

Hi lovelies,

Happy New Month! I guess it’s far too late for me to wish you all a Happy New Year, seeing as we’re now well into the month of February. However, I hope 2022 has been good to each of you thus far, and I wish you all nothing but happiness, success and good health throughout the year.

I know it’s been quite a while since I’ve posted anything on here, but today I wanted to share some of the life lessons I learnt over the last year. 2021 was a whirlwind of a year for me. It was filled with so many highs and just as many lows. It was definitely a year that pushed me out of my comfort zones, changed my mindset, and also caused me to consider the fact that not everything is always as it seems.

When I look back on the previous year, here are 3 major life lessons that I learnt.

1. Trust your gut

I’m sure we’ve all heard the old saying “trust your gut”. It refers to listening to your intuition. By doing so, this enables us to avoid unhealthy situations and relationships.

Over the last year, I was lucky enough to work overseas – and as wonderful as the opportunity was – in one way or another, it continously reminded me of the importance of staying true to oneself.

More often than not, I was forced to refocus on my gut feelings, and although this would sometimes feel similar to physical feelings associated with anxiety, in due time I would always feel a sense of safety, peace and even happiness, once I had followed my gut.

“Sometimes we create our own heartbreaks through ignoring our intuition”

2. Do not overly depend on any one person

Now before I delve into this point, I want to start by saying that I am a firm believer in the proverb that states that ‘no man is an island’, meaning that none of us are truly self sufficient. We desire human connections for comfort and community.

However, that doesn’t mean we should overly depend on any one person, whether that be your partner, best friend, cousin, mother, father and/or sibling.

The reality is, that we came into this world alone, and we’ll leave it alone. So, whilst we continue to rely on community in order to thrive in each of our individual lives, let’s learn to also stand alone. Become comfortable in your own company – there is honestly nothing more empowering than learning to enjoy ones solitude. By doing so you will quickly grow to learn that your happiness, self worth and state of contentment is not determined by others.

“Never search for happiness in others, it will make you feel alone. Search for it within yourself, you will feel happy even when you’re left alone”

3. Admitting you need help is okay

“One of the biggest defects in life is the inability to ask for help”

Everyone of us require help, and support every once in a while – and this is perfectly fine. As mentioned previously, ‘no man is an island’, therefore we cannot and shouldn’t expect ourselves to carry troubles all on our own.

Unfortunately, many of us still struggle to ask for help, even when we desperately need it. As a result we leave ourselves open to feelings of depression which may also result in the deterioration of our careers and relationships. Some of us have the belief that to be considered a ‘strong individual’ you must be able to face all your challenges on your own. However, this is very far from the truth.

By asking for help when we need it, we save ourselves from a lot of unnecessary emotional burden.

Remember, “a problem shared is a problem halved”

In the words of Barack Obama,

“… Don’t be afraid to ask for help when you need it. I do that every day. Asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness, it’s a sign of strength. It shows you have the courage to admit when you don’t know something, and then allows you to learn something new.”

2009

I could continue to list out many other lessons I learnt over the course of 2021, but I thought I would keep this blog short and sweet. I hope that this blog post resonated with at least one of you, and reinforced something that you needed to hear.

With that being said, I hope 2022 is filled with nothing but growth for each every single one of us.

Reflect, refresh and refocus as often, and as much as you need to.

Love, Nyasha x

Count your blessings

Hi lovelies,

Firstly, I just want to say a massive thank you for all the support shown in my previous blogpost – writing has always been one of my favourite pastimes, so I really appreciate every single interaction shown on what I put out there.

In today’s blog post, I wanted to talk a little bit about gratitude and why it’s important to count your blessings.

In life, it is so easy to fall victim to the fallacy of permanence, most of us don’t stop to recognise our good fortune and blessings until they are gone. When asked, I would usually describe myself, as having a glass half full mindset, however quiet recently I noticed that I was slipping into constant and frequent states of ingratitude. In these moments I would moan and grumble about everything and anything under the sun, and because of this, my overall mindset became rather negative. Luckily, I quickly realised this and decided to intentionally focus a little more on the good in my life.

I once read a quote that said;

” A sincere attitude of gratitude is a beatitude for secured altitudes. Appreciate what you have been given and you will be promoted higher.”

Israelmore Ayivor

Having now, readapted my attitude of gratitude, I have come to see a positive change in my life. I am making it more of a habit to express thankfulness and appreciation in all areas, no matter how big or small. This in turn has made me feel so much more satisfied with life, because I am no longer seeking for more. I am consciously making the decision to live in the present moment.

So if you haven’t done so in a while, I would personally encourage you to write down some of the things you’re grateful for. This could include simple things such as, food, clothing, family and friends; or even more elaborate things such as life’s challenges, love, laughter and even heartbreaks.

You will be surprised at how full your heart feels as you come to realize how much you have to be thankful for.

Love, Nyasha x

How to motivate yourself during the academic year

Hi lovelies,

How are you all keeping?

It honestly feels like I haven’t checked in with all of you, in months!

I’m currently just trying to survive the final four months of my degree, therefore, I have very limited time for writing. However, today I wanted to share three simple ways to motivate yourself during the academic year.

  1. Talk to your friends

Friendships are an integral part of the college experience.

The friends you make in college play a major role in most, if not all, of the college memories you’ll cherish for life.

Although they are great to party with, never forget how relatable they are.

You are all in this academic journey together, therefore, they know more than anyone else, how demotivating, the whole learning process may sometimes be.

College is like a never ending rollercoaster.

There are many highs, but with them, comes just as much lows.

Assignment deadlines are nothing but demotivating – once you finish a task, there’s always another one lingering around the corner. The cycle just never seems to end!

This cycle, often leaves students feeling drained, physically and emotionally, and, as a consequence, doubtful thoughts begin to blossom.

College friends are crucial in times where you may feel this way.

By talking to one another you will soon feel reassured, not alone, hopeful and comforted.

2. Focus on the bigger picture

College is full of endless hurdles, that can sometimes leave you questioning, if you are wasting your time or not. In the process of attaining your degree, you often lose focus of your goals, and although this is very natural, do not allow yourself to lose all hope.

Instead, focus on the bigger picture.

Remind yourself of why you applied to college.

Remind yourself, of the many achievements you wish to accomplish, and never stop striving for what you want! – no matter how hard it may seem at times.

College is a stepping stone to all your future career goals. So give it your best shot!

3. Celebrate little achievements

As mentioned above, college assignments and deadlines are seemingly never-ending.

Therefore, make sure to celebrate yourself, once you’ve completed one.

You deserve to celebrate all the hard work, tears, energy and dedication that you’ve spent whilst completing each task.

By celebrating your achievements, you give yourself, the necessary shot of motivation needed to get to the end.

Staying motivated in college, is imperative to your success.

If you’re anything like me, and sometimes have trouble motivating yourself, try applying these tips to help you stay driven, as you approach graduation.

This college year is almost over, and summer 2020 will soon be in reach, so get yourself motivated, and FAST!

“You don’t want to look back and know you could’ve done better”.

Love, Nyasha x

New Year, New Decade.

Hi lovelies,

Happy New Year! 2019 has come and gone, and a new decade has finally arrived. The last year has been truly amazing! I grew as an individual, learnt valuable life lessons and learnt to appreciate the ugly that sometimes comes with the good in life. In today’s blog post I wanted to share three tips on how to slay the coming year!

If you are anything like the rest of the population, the new year often comes with the pressure to change up your life in order to be the best possible version of you.

However, this facade can sometimes be so detrimental to our wellbeing, as it often adds unnecessary pressure to succeed.

The use of social media often adds to this, as our feeds slowly become filled with endless #goals, gym updates and healthy eating posts – and although these can all be a source of encouragement to the rest of us – dwelling on posts like this on a day to day basis can sometimes do more harm than good.

But just before we allow the January blues to get to us, I wanted to share a few ways to make this year your very own!

*Remember it’s never too late*

1. Reflect

You only have one life, so make the most out of it!

Every year is a fresh start, a whole new chapter to rewrite YOUR destiny, YOUR hopes and YOUR dreams.

Not the dreams of the people you follow on Instagram, or the people that surround you on a daily basis.

But your own!

So take some time to reflect on the last year.

Reflect on mistakes, downfalls and shortcomings , and make a plan to ensure that you come out stronger this year.

Identify your weaknesses, establish ground rules and stop undermining your worth!

“Don’t be afraid to fail. Be afraid not to try”

2. Write down YOUR goals

The process of writing down your goals allows you to refocus your attention on what really matters.

There’s just something about being able, to see your goals, all written in one place, that is so motivating.

By writing down your aspirations, you create a physical reminder of what you hope to achieve – something that you can always look at when you feel demotivated.

So make some time, grab a notebook and start writing down your heart desires!

As Steve Maraboli once said, “If you have a goal. Write it down. If you do not write it down, you do not have a goal – you have a wish.”

3. Only make time for things that bring you joy

I think we can all agree that life is so much better when you spend time doing the things that you enjoy.

So this year I challenge everyone reading this, to make as much time for things that put a smile on our faces.

You would be surprised, at how much your life could change by simply taking time out of your mundane day to day tasks, to find ways to incorporate the things and people you love.

When we spend time doing the things we love, we become happier, healthier and more successful, because our lives are driven by passion and not by the endless demands of life.

January 2020, and the months that follow, are all brand new opportunities, for all of us, to create the life of our dreams!

Don’t let anything or anyone hold you back!

Start doing you, for you!

Love, Nyasha x

Why prioritizing yourself, is the best decision you’ll ever make

Hi lovelies,

How are you all keeping?

Before I dive into today’s blog post, I just want to apologize for the lack of content on this blog lately. The reality is that, college has finally decided to take its preeminence in my life again. Deadlines are beginning to pile up on me, and as a result, for the time being, I have no other choice but to prioritize my education, meaning content on the blog will now be limited to when I can, instead of on a weekly basis.

I am not saying goodbye, but I am just giving each of you a heads up, not to be expecting a weekly blog post as I was previously accustomed to. Instead I will try pop on as often as I can, with as much advice, updates and positive energy, as possible!

For the time being, I just want to say thank you for the continuous support that each of you have given me since starting – I honestly feel like I can never say it enough.

For all the shares, comments, words of encouragement and for simply taking the time to read what I put out. Thank you!

Anyways… enough of the soppy stuff. Let’s get into the topic, of today’s blog post;

Why prioritizing yourself, is the best decision you’ll ever make.

Growing up, I was always that child who would drop everything and anything to be there for the people around me.

I have a very giving personality and I never really knew my limit. I would bend backwards for people who would rarely do the same for me.

As I went through my teenage years, I quickly identified this trait and how detrimental it was becoming for me. I was beginning to feel exhausted, frustrated and even angry when I would not receive the same energy I would consistently give out.

I would question my self worth, identity, friendships and life itself. All because I had convinced myself that I loved being a giver. That I am someone everyone should be able to count on, when they are in need.

From a young age we are all taught that giving is the best way to show kindness.

We are all guilty at chorusing the idea that ‘sharing is caring’ – but never explaining to what extent. No wonder why it becomes so easy for some of us to get caught up in unhealthy cycles that may begin to take a toil on our health.

When your constantly the one who gives and gives, you risk burning yourself out. Your well, begins to run dry, and as a result you begin to form resentful feelings.

If you relate to ever feeling any of the above emotions because of your tendency to give a little more than is necessary, I want to encourage you to find a balance.

Begin to identify when your giving out of love or when you’re giving out of guilt and negativity.

Unfortunately I can’t tell you exactly how to find this balance for yourself, but what I can share, is how doing so, for myself, has benefited me.

1. I began to value myself

As I mentioned above, over giving caused me to develop negative emotions. It took a significant toil on my self-esteem and made me question my self worth and value. I almost began to feel like it was normal for people to walk all over me. However, once I identified the negative emotions, that stemmed from giving too much. I quickly began to put value on myself.

Now I have learnt to quickly take two steps back, when I feel under appreciated or taken for granted.

I’m not saying that I expect to be thanked or praised when I go out of my way for someone, but if I’m constantly questioning the other individuals intentions, my time will quickly become limited.

2. My giving became much more genuine

If you were to ask me what my favorite characteristic, that I possess is, I would undoubtedly say that it is my giving spirit.

However at one point in time, I found myself giving for all the wrong reasons. I remember feeling guilty and under pressure, to do it all! To give, because it made me look good, or because I felt morally obliged to.

To overcome this, I had to learn to prioritize my own needs, and as a result, I started giving from a cheerful place, once again!

I took care of my own needs, which in turn gave me the energy necessary, to take care of, and put energy that was light, joyful and void of pressure, into others.

3. I began to focus on my own goals

When your a naturally giving person, it is very easy to focus entirely on other individuals, besides yourself.

You begin to focus all your time and energy into them, leaving little to no time for you. You slowly become sidetracked by their life, and slowly begin to divert all attention, away from your own ambitions and plans.

By balancing how much of me, I was giving to people, I began to regain my own zeal for life. I no longer craved that thrill, I got from helping people. I stopped allowing, giving to be the only drive I had in life. I realized I had more to offer!

Prioritizing myself, was and is one of the best decisions I have ever made, because it caused me to develop as an individual. I became an even happier person, because I grew to be content in myself, as opposed to being content in the way others saw me. I started to become (well at least tried…), as invested in myself as I was in others.

To whoever this has resonated with – I beg you to find your balance. Stop feeling guilty. Let go of the pressures of society.

Protect your energy, by prioritizing yourself.

Yes it’s all well and good, to be there for everyone and anyone, but if you can’t even be there for yourself, what good are you?

Reminder; You are allowed to help yourself before you help others.

Love, Nyasha x

The Pressure of Young Success

Hi lovelies,

It’s been less than a week, but it honestly feels like forever since I sat down at my laptop with the intent to blog. I actually miss having all the time in the world for blogging – but now I’m back to routines, time tables and managing college assignments, what a dream!

Whilst getting ready for work, last Sunday I decided to incorporate something new into my morning routine; listening to a podcast! Considering I had a lot of catching up to do, I decided to tune into ‘Stallion’ a podcast hosted by Agnes – Clara Dikoum (available across multiple platforms).

While scrolling through her podcasts, a particular one titled “Pressure of Young Success”, caught my attention. With college back in the works, and graduation 2020 on my mind, the thoughts of success and what to do next, are constantly lingering in my head.

It’s crazy, isn’t it. We go from being children who couldn’t care less about what’s to come, to young people, who desire control in every phase of our lives. If you are anything like me, your mind begins to time travel – and ever so vividly, at that. You begin to imagine yourself 5 years older, financially stable, with a house, car, husband, and a secure job you love. All of which don’t occur overnight but somehow you begin to desire, that this could be your reality.

In May 2018, a survey undertaken by the Mental Health Foundation, found that six out of ten young people, between the ages of 18-24, have felt so stressed by the pressures to succeed, that they began struggling to cope with life’s demands.

Although alarming, these figures don’t even surprise me in the slightest.

In a world that is populated with pressure, not only from your family and friends, but also celebrities, influencers, ‘instagram goals’ and much, much more – it is so hard, not to get sunk into the idea that success occurs over night.

On a daily basis, we are fed unrealistic expectations of what life should consist of, how we should be living, or what stage of life we should be at.

For some of us, our goals are set to be completed by the age of 25 and for others it could be 30.

This mindset however, can be so unrealistic and detrimental for our futures.

I’m not saying you can’t be successful by the age of 30 – Forbes 30 under 30, already argues otherwise. However, it is important to remember that success is not always measured by power, status, fame and/or money.

The word success is described in the Cambridge Dictionary as “the [achievemnet] of … results wanted or hoped for”. These results are not limited to time and can be achieved on the straight or narrow path, depending on the individual and their resources. By staying determined and consistent, and by accepting failures, set backs and obstacles, we each have the ability to come out on top.

Don’t let other people’s definitions of success define you.

“Love the life you have, while you create the life of your dreams”

Love, Nyasha x

Stop underestimating yourself

Hi lovelies,

Before I get into this weeks blogpost, I just want to say my sincere apologies for not posting one last week. I was honestly so exhausted by the time it got to the weekend, and just kept experiencing writing blocks whenever I sat down to write. Thankfully I’m well rested now, the sun is shining and I am feeling super motivated to conquer the week!

Yesterday as I was scrolling through Instagram, I came across a quote that read “Stop underestimating yourself”.

Tomorrow, I start my final year in college – and I’d be lying to you, if I was to say that, I wasn’t feeling worried and overwhelmed. Quite simply, the thoughts of ‘THE THESIS’ scare me! When I think about gathering all the research involved in it, I start to undermine not only my abilities but also myself.

For some reason, in my head I have managed to construct the belief that I am going to walk into my Research Project module and be flung into the deep end with 0 assistance. However, in reality, I know this won’t be the case. I can be rest assured that my lecturers, friends and family will be there every step of the way – to offer guidance, support and encouragement when in need.

This year surely wont be the easiest but I will definitely pull through it.

“Sometimes when you are the closest to your breakthrough the pressure is the greatest. You have come too far to give up now!” – Joyce Meyer

Whether you are starting college, going into your final year, or embarking on a new life venture, do not underestimate yourself.

Believe in your abilities.

Each of us was born with the potential to do great things – but those great things can only come to flourish when we believe.

“You must expect great things of yourself, before you can do them”

Love, Nyasha x

Summer 2019, Recap

“You know all those things you’ve always wanted to do? You should go do them”

Hi lovelies, 

As we are drawing near to the end of summer now, I just wanted to do a quick recap of my summer, and all it had to offer me. This summer I vowed to myself to live life to the fullest and seize any opportunity to do things I found fulfilling. Although I didn’t get the opportunity to fly out to live my best life, or jaiye at Afronation, I can confidently say that, Summer 2019, you have been too good. 

Despite having started my summer sick and brittle, I quickly recovered after plenty of much needed rest and once better, I didn’t waste any time to start making plans with those I love. 

May

After 10 days of not seeing them, the college girls and I met up for a shopping trip in Dublin City. As someone who used not to be very confident in their navigation of the town, I was pleasantly surprised on how good my navigation was. We spent the day gallivanting, and to end the day we went to TGI Friday’s, on Temple Bar.

June

June was such a busy month for me. On the 2nd of June, I decided to finally bite the bullet and start this blog – meaning any spare time I once had, was and is now spent typing. However, thankfully, it has been such a wonderful and surreal experience thanks to all of you who have been reading them on a weekly basis.

Other than working and integrating blogging to my lifestyle, I also tried to spend some quality time with my family.

This was also the month that I got engrossed in all thing Love Island despite my original dismissal of the show. Without getting into too much detail, I’m actually happy that I ended up watching the show, as I gained some valuable life lessons (suprise suprise!!).

  1. Sisters before misters ALWAYS!!
  2. Be confident in you
  3. Always expect the unexpected

July

As some of you may know this year I was resident more so in Wexford than Kildare – meaning I had little to no time with my family and friends from home throughout the academic year.

July, however offered plenty of time for me to catch up with those near and dear. Roadtrips, cinema dates and everything in between were had.


August

As I am writing this, the month of August is not yet over. However, in the next two weeks I will, most likely be spending, most of my days in work, so I will not have much left to recap with you.

So far I have spent this month attending events such as Girlz Arize and CTY 15 hours of Praise. I’ve also been catching up with friends, embarking on road-trips and engaging in family time.

Overall, like I said at the very start of this blog post, I am very content with how my summer has gone this year. I wanted to be productive in whatever I found myself doing, whilst having a nice balance of work and fun – and I can confidently say I did just that.

“Be spontaneous. Be crazy. Leave your comfort zone and live with no regrets.”

Love, Nyasha x

“You will overcome this”

Hi lovelies,

Yes, here I am, actually fulfilling my promise to deliver a second blog post this week. Congratulations to me!

Whilst scrolling through Instagram the other night (as you do), I came across a quote that read “YOU WILL OVERCOME THIS” – and I don’t know whether it was the pink writing the words were displayed on, or the words themselves that resonated with me. But I suddenly felt an undeniable sense of comfort.

I began to think about the post I saw on Instagram, at the start of the week, from an individual who was out for a walk but stumbled upon a teenager who had just received their results – under a tree branch with a rope straddling down, within seconds of taking their own life. I began to think about my family and friends who are going through times where they feel like all hope is gone. I also, began to think about me… and the things that worry me from time to time. The things I think I will never achieve or accomplish.

I then began to think about all the things that I had overcome, such as secondary school, consistent negative thinking, state exams and 2nd year college exams (cause those were a real struggle this year). I began to realize that at one point in time, I also believed that I would never overcome these things… but here I am. These things no longer give me any reason to cry or have anxious thoughts, concerning them.

Today I just wanted to encourage anyone and everyone… including myself, who may be reading this. I wanted to remind you that irrespective of the current tribulation you may be experiencing, YOU WILL OVERCOME! Trust me, I know it’s a lot easier to say when you are not in the moment yourself – but those 4 words hold a lot more truth than you may realize. You will overcome this, no matter what the situation may be. There is hope for you. You are not a failure. You are loved. You will succeed.

Love, Nyasha x